birthday

A while ago, one of my close friends (Sara, actually), asked me something very interest. She asked me if I thought I might have a different idea of birthdays and felt differently around my birthday compared to other people because I had always had to share this day. While for others, birthdays are often an opportunity take a moment and celebrate oneself, I always shared it with someone, and made sure to call and write cards and send gifts around the time I was celebrating my own additional year of life. She wondered if that changed how I person treats his or her birthday.

I don't think that the sharing of my birthday has made me any more generous or selfless than the next person. I've still thrown myself parties and dinners, and sometimes I'll treat myself to a new outfit or some expensive books I've been wanting to read, or some other delightful treat. I don't think that sharing my birthday has made me a more thoughtful or better person. But I do believe that sharing my birthday every year makes me a lucky person.

I'm officially 23 years old (as of 27 minutes ago), and as I am a rather introspective person, it makes me think of all I've learned, everything I've felt, all I've seen in the past year. All the happiness, all of the pain, all of the loss, the new friends, the old friends, the changes, and all the things that have stayed the same. But I also think of the 23 years that I've shared with my twin sister.

As people go, we are as different as we could possibly be:

She has light brown eyes while mine are so dark that my driver's license indicates that I have black eyes.

She has a round face. I have an oval face.

She is a mechanical engineer studying architecture. I am a wannabe economist researching public policy.

When she's upset, she yells. When I'm upset, I cry.

We are different. But something about this sisterly bond keeps us tied closely to one another though we see ourselves diverging in our personalities more and more every day. Though she infuriates me sometimes, and I stretch her every last nerve, she is still the one person that can quell my incontrollable sobbing when I find myself up late panicking about life. She is beautiful, brilliant, hilarious, creative, an independent thinker, self-assured in her ideas about living and life, and stronger than almost anyone I know, and she is my sister.

It is possible that I treat birthdays differently, as I've always shared this day, a day that for many is more of a day to celebrate the self. But I'm lucky that it didn't turn out that way. Because on my birthday, I get to celebrate not only my own life, but also the life of my incredible sister.

Happy 23rd Birthday, Jin! I love you.